Erik Is Too Sexy For His Shirt
by Izulza
Summary: How do you suppose Erik unwinds after a stressful day of Phantoming? Song belongs to Right Said Fred. DISCLAIMER- I own nothing! Except myself! I belong to me!


Erik looked around and made sure no one was around. _No one…_ Erik grinned and made sure his equipment was ready and functional. _Perfect_

Erik took in a deep breath. _If I am discovered I will be ruined until the end of days. But I need this too much._ He moved into position and gripped the remote as doubt begged him to quit. _It's now or never!_

He hit the first button and several brightly coloured lights flooded the room. He had to blink quickly to adjust his eyes. He gulped. _Here goes nothing!_ He pressed the red button.

 _ **I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love**_

 _ **Love's going to leave me**_

The music blasted from his surround sound system as he rolled his shoulders and bobbed his head in time with the music. Erik threw his cape away dramatically as Right Said Fred began singing again.

 _ **I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt**_

 _ **So sexy it hurts**_

He gracefully pushed his jacket to the edge of his shoulders then slipped his arms out of the sleeves and the clothing fell to his feet only for him to kick it away.

 _ **And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan**_

 _ **New York and Japan**_

Erik started thrusting his pelvis back and forth as one hand went to the buttons of his waist coat and uttered a sexy sigh every time he popped a button loose. He threw the coat off and sent it flying into a wall

 _ **And I'm too sexy for your party**_

 _ **Too sexy for your party**_

 _ **No way I'm disco dancing**_

Erik tapped his feet as he pulled a few Saturday Night Fever moves.

 _ **I'm a model you know what I mean**_

 _ **And I do my little turn on the catwalk**_

Erik pulled a duck face and strutted in a straight line while loosening his cravat then swinging it around before turning around in a circle on his heel.

 _ **Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah**_

 _ **I do my little turn on the catwalk**_

Erik danced in place. "I'm sooooo SEXY!" he whispered to himself.

 _ **I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car**_

 _ **Too sexy by far**_

Erik ran his cravat between his teeth then discarded it.

 _ **And I'm too sexy for my hat**_

 _ **Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that**_

He whipped off his fedora then sent it flying like a Frisbee.

 _ **I'm a model you know what I mean**_

 _ **And I do my little turn on the catwalk**_

Again he swayed his hips as he walked in a straight line then stopped in a sexy pose.

 _ **Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah**_

 _ **I shake my little tush on the catwalk**_

Erik bent over slightly and jiggled his butt in time with the beat.

 _ **I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my**_

The Phantom ripped his shirt completely off his hard, chiselled body and tossed it away.

 _ **'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean**_

 _ **And I do my little turn on the catwalk**_

 _ **Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah**_

 _ **I shake my little tush on the catwalk**_

Erik undid his belt buckle and slid it out of the loops.

 _ **I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat**_

 _ **Poor pussy poor pussy cat**_

Erik slinked up to his cat and playfully stroked her head

 _ **I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love**_

 _ **Love's going to leave me**_

Erik whipped his belt as he strutted up to his full length mirror while pouting and squinting as he approached.

 _ **And I'm too sexy for this song**_

The song ended with Erik ripping his pants off as if they were Velcro revealing a sparkly gold banana hammock speedo. He paused in front of his reflection and winked at himself.

Meanwhile behind the two way mirror me and Emmy stood panting quietly. "Izulza you were right! This was worth crawling out of bed at 2 am." She breathed.

"Oh yeah. And the best part is he does this every month on this date at this time." I informed her. "I think he does this to feel good about himself or to release stress."

"Eh, who needs ovaries, am I right?!" she giggled. I quickly shushed her, and then she furrowed her brow. "Where did he get the speedo?" she whispered.

"You know… I don't think I want to know that particular answer." Emmy thought about it then nodded. We then went back to watching Erik flex his muscles and clench his bum in front of the mirror.

* * *

So how many of you love me now?

I think it's about time a fic like this existed. I hope you all enjoyed Erik stripping.

Oh and check out eenchilada98. She is a great writer and I personally recommend both her Phantom and Marvel fics. I hope you all enjoy!

Love you all, my pretties!

 _ **IZULZA**_


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